5 Ways to Embrace Slow Motherhood this Season

There is no shortage of productivity tips for moms floating around these days.  How to get more done as a stay-at-home mom, how to work from home with kids.  You name it, there is someone out there telling you how to get it done.

Like, somehow we just decided that as moms, we should be able to do it all. 

Keep up with the home, raise kind, well-mannered children, provide enrichment activities, schedule play dates, cook healthy meals, keep in touch with friends and family, play with your kids, be adventurous, keep up with who wears what size this season, work outside of the home, or inside of the home – but have something that’s your own, because you are more that “just a mom”, work-out,  oh, and don’t forget self-care.  Must not forget self-care because you can’t do all the other things you need to do if you don’t take care of you.  And this is really just scratching the surface.  I mean, hello…laundry….

And I don’t know about you, but I am tired.  

Like perpetually tired.  But, more nights than I’d like to admit, I can’t get my brain to turn off it’s to-do list so I can go to sleep.  Man, what I’d give to just drift off quickly no matter what – like my husband seems to be able to do.

Now, before you think I’m going to tell you to just drop everything because you’re kids are only little once, I’m not.  Because even this tired Mama craves some semblance of order and we actually really do love play dates and adventures.

But the thing that is making me so incredibly tired is the feeling like somehow I have to do it all.  All the time.

Can we just acknowledge that raising tiny humans is a lot of work and one of the most important jobs out there?  Can we stop glorifying “busy” and instead focus on things like contentment, peace, balance, rest?  Let’s even learn again what it means to truly rest?  

With summer quickly approaching, I don’t know about you, but I’m feel a strong pull to slow this motherhood thing down.  To re-group and create regular rhythms of work, play, and rest in our home.

And if that’s you, too – maybe we can slow down together.

5 Ways to Embrace Slow Motherhood

Here are five things I’m doing to become a more slow mom so that I can be more present in the midst of the hustle and bustle that is motherhood.

Make a Restful List

There are some days where I wonder what it feels like to truly rest.  Sure, sleeping is part of the equation – but with young children, sleep is only partially in my own control.

So then, what does it mean to rest in this often busy and demanding season of motherhood?

It’s something I’ve been thinking on for a few months now and I’ve even found myself on days with our family thinking to myself, “this feels restful”.  And then I want to bottle that feeling right up.

If you’re like me and find it difficult to rest, perhaps you could make a list of things that feel restful to you.  Things that help you feel calm, rejuvenated, and refreshed.

It might sound silly to make a list, but when you’re in the middle of chaos, it can be hard to remember your way back to calm.

Here are a few ideas to get you started:

• Take a nap.
• Read a book.
• Spend time in prayer.
• Write a letter.
• Create something.

Your list will be different from mine, but it’s important to know what kinds of things are restful to you.  You can even share this list with your spouse to help them know how to be supportive of your need for rest.

Find What Sparks Joy

“Sparks joy” is a buzzword these days, I know.  But there isn’t a better way to say it.  Just like it’s important to find those things that make you feel rested, pay attention to the things that bring you the most joy.

Of course, not everything brings joy.  Cleaning showers, for example, does not bring me joy.  BUT, having a clean home DOES spark joy for me.  And actually, I find a lot of joy in having some uninterrupted time to clean and organize our home.

I also enjoy going on adventures with the boys (and scheduling them so that they don’t interrupt nap times) or doing crafts and activities with them.

Some other things that are on my joy list:

• Nap time / quiet time
  • Because as much as I love being a stay-at-home mom, having that little bit of calm and quiet in the afternoon is incredibly helpful.
• Bible study
• Time with friends
• Getting a yummy latte or baked treat.
  • Or ice cream

Find those things that make you feel full.  What are the activities that are most life-giving to you and your family?  Prioritize those on your schedule so that you’ll be filled up for the other things that are necessary, but not as enjoyable.

Pro-tip:  knowing what is most life-giving to your family will also enable you to say no without guilt for those things that do not.  

Stay Home

Next, if you’re starting to feel overwhelmed or tired, or if you’ve been on the go a lot, just stay home.  Pick a day to stay home.  Especially after we’ve been traveling or if we’ve had a particularly busy week, I love to take one day to just stay home and “reset”.

On these days, I’ll usually try to get some laundry done or clean during naps, but we focus on just enjoying one another at home.

We play outside or with toys inside, practice some of our chores (like putting things away), read books, watch a few shows, dance to our favorite songs, and just spend time together.

Even though we enjoy our adventures – sometimes staying home is just what the doctor ordered.

In full disclosure, we do sometimes venture out on our “home” days – to a nearby playground or take a walk, but we try to stay close to home at least once a week!

Create a Schedule You Love

Whether you’re more structured or spontaneous, I really think it’s important to have some sort of schedule for your days.  Our family thrives on a predictable, although flexible, schedule and routine.

In the morning we have breakfast and play time, we do a sort of circle time, where we go over the day of the week and the date.  We read our Bible, enjoy music, and talk about our plans for the day.

We take naps or have quiet time after lunch.

And we try to have regular times to tidy-up our toys throughout the day.

It’s not perfect, but it’s something that I’m working on incorporating this summer – regular rhythms to our day that help us all know what to expect and empower all of us – boys included – to participate in the daily activities and chores of our family.

Find a rhythm or routine that works best for your family – and then enjoy the flow of your day.

Unplug

And finally – the one that is the MOST difficult for me – UNPLUG.

I think that one of the biggest reasons moms are so tired these days has to do with technology and our always connected lifestyle.  (I realize the irony of me writing this in a blog post that you probably found on social media – or Google, if I’m lucky.)

We’ve allowed ourselves to be always “on”.  Always available.  We get a little ping every time someone has a thought they want to share with us.  Every time someone posts something on social media.  And we feel a need to engage.  To respond.  To share our lives also.  (Or to capture all the moments.)

And I don’t think it’s all bad – I love being able to capture this season so easily and I am thankful for so many of the connections I’ve made on social media and the way it allows me to keep up with friends more easily and to access information quickly.

But, there is this pressure to somehow measure up in this virtual world.  And man, what a time-suck the mindless scrolling can be if we are not careful.

So, this summer, I’m challenging myself to unplug more.  To turn it on do not disturb and leave it on the counter.

I’m ready for a more slow motherhood.  Will you join me in slowing down this summer?

For more inspiration, be sure to check out my friend Bee’s post about Leaning into the Present.  She’s full of great advice on being in the present and still capturing moments with your family!